Glamour Magazine Is Horrible Advice

Perfect reading for those times when you don't feel like actually reading anything.

Okay, I will attest that my title is perhaps a generalization. How big of one? I am not sure, since I am basing this off entirely one article that I had happened to read in Glamour's April 2013 issue. Surprisingly enough, it was the one article I happened to open the magazine up to. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I was laughing. Hoping for some sort of sense to come from it but it never came. It was like watching a grown woman cry over Justin Bieber, it just didn't make any sense why anyone would put themselves out there like this. I tried. I really did. However, it reminded why so many people are confused about a lot of things, especially training/fitness, because they get their advice from bad resources.

The particular article I am referring to is titled:

"Work Your Arms, Forget The Rest!"

"Sexy arms trick everyone into thinking your whole body is that good. A quick results routine."

By: Shaun Dreisbach

Page 148, April 2013 Issue, Glamour Magazine

Now, already there is so much bullshit in the title and subtitle. Which is probably why it caught my eye... I honestly could not believe someone would write that. For many, many reasons I will quickly go over. The article was very short so I will caption here below.

""A toned upper body gets noticed more than any other body part," says New York City trainer Jay Cardiello, who helped Jennifer Lopez shape hers. Sculpted arms, he says, make you look leaner all over, no matter what the reality is. Plus, they tone up faster than any other muscle group! So-- you in? Do his routine three days a week, going through the whole thing twice (don't skip the cardio bursts). You'll see results in two weeks. Then get out every sleeveless number you own."

It then goes on to show the reader 4 exercises labeled "Seagull, Ferris Wheel, Caterpillar, and Drop-Back." Author Shaun Dreisbach is so kind to give us a picture and description as well.

Seagull is really just a fuckin plank where you hold one arm out either in front of you or beside you for 30 seconds. He calls it seagull because I guess where he comes from there are some sort of circus seagulls that fly around using just one wing. These seagulls, with their one flying wing, will fly in a circle, which is exactly where this exercise is going to get you... back where you started.

Ferris Wheel is where, I'm not shitting you, someone holds a book and curls it then does arm circles with both hands. A book. Albeit he says "heavy book" I can't imagine what a heavy book is... unless you have a stone tablet used to record the 10 Commandments I got a bright idea... pick up a dumbbell, a bag of rice, a gallon of water. A Book?

Then Caterpillar, which is where you go from a standing position, walking your hands out to push-up position and then back to standing. I can accept this one... but we went from training with books to performing a rather challenging core exercise. Are we training fit women or elderly patients in a nursing home?

Last, the Drop-Back, which is entirely to hard to explain without a picture and I even did a Google search "Drop-Back Exercise" and found nothing. It really resembles a yoga exercise which would look like it would have a lot of benefit in terms of bodyweight training, but I don't see the correlation to strickly just training your arms. As it involves quite a bit of flexibility... and I'm losing it...

Here's My Beef 

I am always for great alternatives to give to people to make their bodies healthier, stronger, and even for people to feel better about themselves. Not everyone can squat, bench, and deadlift. I understand that. Here are the lies in this article...

"Work Your Arms Forget the Rest"- Worst advice ever. You will get no where by just working your arms. Do this long enough and you have a healthy recipe of injury, muscle imbalance, and a body you will be very unhappy with. Plus, every exercise he lists, involves the rest of the body. Which is already negating his idea of arms only "toning."

"Sexy arms trick everyone into thinking your whole body is that good."- No!You think anybody gives a shit about J.Lo's arms or that is even what everybody notices first? No! Its her ass. Her hips. Her waist. Her posture

OMG! I love your earrings Jennifer!

What is worse is they have a picture of Jennifer Lopez, with the caption "The workout that made J.Lo look this amazing." What? Are you kidding me? The sad part is someone is going to believe that unfortunately.

The article claims that toned arms make you look leaner all over. No they don't, end of story. If you have excess fat around your waist, neck, hips, thighs... guess what, you still see it. By the way, I hate the term tone. It means nothing. A discussion for another time.

The article really just aggravated the hell out of me. Beyond measure really, because it is a great example of how magazines don't know what the hell they are talking about. It is bothersome and embarassing to think that they published this! As far as J.Lo's trainer, he probably knows what he is talking about and this douche bag Shaun Dreisbach fucked it up so bad that it makes Paris Hilton look like an intelligent quality role model.

I can see where this article could have been beneficial but there is so much information missing and the advice is absolutely horrible. Pretty much every sentence is diarrhea. If you read magazines... be careful with what advice you take. After all, there is only one true magazine, and that is National Geographic.